Do you ever feel like you are being pulled in every different direction, that you have a never-ending to-do list, or that you have to constantly overextend yourself to make the lives of others easier?
If you answer yes, it is probably time to start saying No. Saying no and meaning it is a straightforward way of making your life easier.
From a young age, we are taught to be amenable and consider the needs of others before ours, prioritising others before ourselves. We are taught that it is the right thing to consider others before us and that putting ourselves last should be the norm. However, what we’re not taught is how draining it is to constantly put yourself on the back burner and choose and champion others before yourself. Putting others ahead of yourself can quickly drain your energy and leave you exhausted. It can feel like you have nothing to give, and when you do, you must first show up for others before you do yourself, leaving your needs and wants forgotten.
Learning to say no without explanation or hesitation is powerful and extremely important in ensuring you sustain your energy and can live your best life. Saying no is essential in ensuring that you are not second to the people in your life and that you can choose yourself and not give all your energy elsewhere.
It is vital that you remember that your life should be about yourself. Your wants, needs and desires should always remain a priority, and while you should consider and prioritise the different relationships in your life, it is essential that they do not become your sole focus or priority. Saying no is an easy way of making your life about you and ensuring that the different relationships empower and fulfil you, not drain you.
Here at GirlDreamer, we know how saying no can change your life, and we want to outline how saying no can create the most positive change in your life and ensure that you live your life for yourself.
You Can Choose Yourself More
Saying no is fundamental in choosing yourself and prioritising your needs and wants.
From a young age, we are taught that prioritising the people in our lives over ourselves is noble and is what we should always do. However, if we do the opposite and choose ourselves, we are selfish and should aim to become more selfless. This notion of prioritising others over ourselves is so easily internalised that it often works to our detriment. As a result, it becomes very normal to choose others and prioritise their needs over our own.
Saying no and saying it often can save you from a life of putting yourself second. It can mean that you are your number one priority and that while you enjoy the different relationships in your life, they do not become your entire focus.
Saying no is vital in choosing and prioritising yourself!
Protect Your Peace
Saying no is the easiest way to protect your peace and not feel responsible for everyone in your life. By saying no and implementing a really important boundary, a burden can be lifted where you no longer feel the need to overcompensate to make everyone else’s life easier but yours.
If you are used to saying yes and over-extending yourself, there is a strong likelihood that you think other people’s problems and issues are yours to fix, deal with and solve. When in reality, figuring out your own issues and fixing them yourself is a normal and vital part of adulthood. Relying on others and asking them to solve your issues lessens your responsibility and may make you less competent in simple problem-solving.
So, while you may think that you are being supportive and kind and are showing up as you need to, you, in fact, may be hindering your friend or family members’ personal development and creating an incredibly unhealthy system of reliance and inefficiency on their end.
Now, we are not saying do not support and show up for the people in your life. But it is vital that as you do, you remember that their problems and issues are their own and not yours to resolve. By saying no and creating that boundary, you can remove that extra stress and burden of having to be everything for everyone else.
By saying no, you can lift an incredibly heavy load and lessen your stress as it relates to other people’s problems.
You Can Live Your Best Life
Saying no can literally change your life for the better.
Saying no gives you the opportunity to prioritise, choose and enjoy yourself. By saying no to the people around you, you are no longer tied to the requirements and responsibilities of others. You can show up for yourself without any trepidation or fear that you are taking away or not doing enough for others.
Saying no to others means that you, your wants and your desires are your greatest priority, and as a result, can live a more fulfilling life centred around you and your needs.
By saying no and saying it often, you can change your life and make your dreams a reality, helping you thrive and do what you actually enjoy.
Saying no is an instrumental step in creating the life you want and living in an authentic way!
